He just asked me if his big had a curved penis. Awkward? I think so.
This got awkward about two "Oh yeah"s ago.
Why is there a case of Coors Light with my address on it?
Two girls are doing the worm relatively well on the bar floor after the fact I just saw one puke in the trash
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well, I suppose if I had to pick a penis to represent the american public, yours would be it
drunk guy next to me on the train just tried to share his pizza with me
he just tried to feed it to me...i love new york
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
I fucked in the bathroom while everyone listened and banged my dick against a table shouting "order in the court"
looked up people from my old yearbooks. 3 ex boyfriends are gay. im getting drunk now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I know the wedding is going to be a good time, I don't have to wear a bra with my dress
I just told a guy I'm a cross of Kim K, Hilary Clinton and a dragon... He was still into it.
I need a hobby that isn't dick related
I need water and some morals
Thanks for being my best friend so I can use you as an alibi to my family while I'm out getting some dick in my face.
This can only be settled by a dance off.
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