I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
He said he's was gunna give me some pain meds. I'm not sure what they are but I just gave him a thumbs up
You are not allowed to borrow my car ever again. It smells like a hobo orgy happened in my backseat with a hint of onion. What did you do.
The way I see it, everyone on campus has a fake, but I'm the only person who actually makes beer in their dorm.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Brownies hit. And just found beer. And the bill cosby show is on. And its in spanish.
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
Do I have to formally apologize to Brett for flashing him?
I want to be your penis for a week.
Well if she's the kinda girl that doesn't want you after seeing a pic of your balls squeezed together, she's not the girl for you.
Literally sitting on my bed in the dark trying not to throw up
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
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