Soo....this goes on the list of odd coincidences. My gyno calls me while I'm going at it, leaves me a message. I check it later... thank God I tested negative.
Those 2 guys from the sonic commercial will be virgins for life.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
He practically bottle-fed me Jameson, like I was a baby chimpanzee on those nature specials.
He legit pounded my cooking wine, because he was to cheap to buy beer. He is so not getting any.
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
So our trip to Disney World ended in the three of us stripping at a gay club in orlando.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
You showed up at my house at 4am with a bloody nose, one shoe and a bucket of chicken... I live no where near a place that sells chicken in a bucket..
Well that would explain the bones in my purse.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
You fell asleep while I was sucking your dick
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
