I just applied for an unsubsidized loan naked. I love the internet.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
The paramedics said she just kept whispering "I just wanted to party"
Fuck that, come home. Let's get drunk and judge people.
Im gonna go lick parts of my apartment. Good night and be ever vigilant, you never know when I'm coming to epoxy your hand to you nipple.
THIS IS SO HOT. BYE PANTIES.
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
I can feel the shame as I walk down your hallway.. good night
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
I just woke up, dressed as Chris Brown, with a bunless hot dog (presumably from 7/11) in my pocket, wearing a pair of shoes I don't recognize as my own. Help.
Randomize
