she had that "i just got used" look on her face when i kicked her out at 5am
It's like a toaster oven for my penis
I've got mace and a condom. Ready to roll either way and keeping my pimp hand strong.
margarita monday on the first day back? my gpa is telling me noo! but my heart is telling me goo! I am conflicted..
I just fully woke up, never smoking that much weed again. I had stress dreams about your house being surrounded by a lake and we kept losing our cars in it.
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
I think it really helped to be hungover at accepted students day. it gave me a good feel for how it would be everyday if I go there.
Note to self. The tub labelled "not water" does not contain water.
Why is there a cash register on top of my car?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
Is it okay to thank someone for the orgasms they gave you, even though they weren't with you?
my bed is a shrine, and I am its goddess.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
It's totally a relationship. we have sex in other people's beds, watch mad men while high and get drunk on his teammates' beer. don't you dare stomp on my dreams with your societal judgments
I am the image of restraint, it's why im just hungover and not in the hospital
Randomize
