problem. drunk. stepbrother hitting on me again. help.
That poor girl was naked and had to be at a job interview in an hour
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
and then he said that the only reasonable explanation as to why I got swine flu was because all I ever do is join the bandwagon
Vodka infused whipped cream. Shit just got real.
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
it was the drunk execution of a sober decision, and its much more tasteful than the first mullet
I GOT A VENDING MACHINE FOR OUR LIVING ROOM
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
There are no winners in a lube eating competition.
If you recall, I made a Zoolander reference almost immediately after you pulled out of me the first time we had sex.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Randomize
