Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
I'm applying temporary tattoos with green beer, this is the life.
I woke up this morning covered in blood and peanut butter. I am now safe from vampires with nut allergies.
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
I feel like I'm full of double a batteries and cocaine.
Guy, there will be accountabilities this weekend that you will need to respond to, or else.
He pointed at me, then leaned in and said "shes the best at blow jobs" then chris fist pumped him and said "dude, I know"
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
Okay who let me pass out in a recliner cuddling a pitbull and a cardboard cutout of Orlando Bloom
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
I just compared my relationship to that double ended dong scene from Requiem. This day just took a turn.
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
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