first i yelled "you cant get it up?" and then in the middle of it i opened a Corona
Since when is my name a synonym for head?
Saved By The Bell: The College Years had it waaaay wrong on that one.
maybe almost giving yourself a concussion counter acts a hangover
and my souvenir for the night was a nice ambulance blanket
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
............HELP Ive been abducted by vodka and its poisoning my brain fat chicks are getting cute and i slept with my sisters friend who slightly resembles john kerry....,,help
Two hot shots of tequila for breakfast? Yeah today is gonna be a shit show
I am sending my doctor an XXXMas card thanking him for my tits!
In the mean time, I'll continue to kick ass at running and become a successful stripper while he might hook up with one average looking girl he met at a club. I so win.
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
Her four year old daughter walked up to me grabbed my junk and said "this will be in mommy later." Wtf?
Some guy walking down the sidewalk just looked at me and said "hey it's the world champ". How drunk was I on Friday...?
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
Any who, I expect to be showered with roses apon my arrival
How about beer and nachos?
A fine substitute!
Randomize
