I would say the hottest chick there looked like Susan Boyle and the ugliest like Bea Arthur
Nice use of current day folklore
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
I had a terrible day! The only thing that makes me feel better is knowing Jack Bauers day was worse.
Yeah, I wouldn't mind getting fingered in the corner of a dive bar again.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I'm not surprised. You have the libido of an Italian soccer team.
Its not gay if you're best friends and there's less than an inch of dick in the picture. That's where the line is drawn
Thats not what we're looking for. I want this kid to suck a lolly pop out of a stripper's snatch.
I can't believe I came last night staring into my profile pictures eyes.
YOU HAVE BEEN BAD TOUCHED BY THE LEPRECHAUN OF CHOICES
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
It feels weird going to sleep without hugging the toilet goodnight
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