Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
He's been dead since March and more people write on his wall than mine.
she used her cellphone as a light to find my clit under the sheets. worst.lesbian.ever.
i gave her road head last night, needless to say it wasn't the same and i bit a chunk of the inside of my cheek off.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
honestly I asked the same thing when we had our slip n slide and margarita party
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Pretty sure I recall hugging our waiter from the bar last night. That also means we are NEVER going there again
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
Thanks for coming over. I'm sorry everyone else was vomiting. Thank you for not vomiting. I love you.
UPDATE: THERE IS ASS EATING. I REPEAT: THERE IS ASS EATING.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Its 9 am & i've been cleaning for 6 hours now with occasional crying bursts and two cocktails. Adulting 101.
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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