First off: I'm drunk so fuck you. Second: you weren't a bad girlfriend. Tres: thats 3 in spanish. Number 4: fuck 3 Doors Down
So tell me more about the cum that came out of your nose
sitting in class between the roommates of the two girls i fucked over break. this feels like a bad version of wife swap
I wasted my skinny years on you. The least you can do is high five me at the bar
Holy mother of cocks. I was grind-with-my-boss drunk last night.
I would take a bullet for Beyonce's baby
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Bro my mom is in for two days and you can't even hold back on the drinking she said as she left i hope he doesn't always pee his pants and he is sure popular with the girls wtf
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
Say whatever you bloody well like; you don't know the true meaning of life until you have smoked to a Sade cd.
His new girl is probably classy and boring. I bet she doesn't feed him sour patch kids while she wiggles his weiner.
He fell asleep cradling my ass and every time I moved he adjusted his hand accordingly. I've found the one.
i agree, on both the sex thing and the unrepentant bastard thing
I've come to the conclusion, I should prob have at least 20 hr supervision. I would say 24, but I'm guaranteed to pass out for at least 4 hrs a day
How’s big weiner McGee?
I’m going to ask you one last time to call him Matt and he’s fine thank you very much
Randomize
