..now you can marry chaz and be in cher's family..
yeah n i dont have to pretend to be into chicks to do it now...
Just threw up in airport security. Happy holidays.
I'm bringing in a picture of a stranger on facebook to get my haircut. I have reached a new level of creepy.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
Was it just me or did you also find it awkward when "glad you came" started playing on pandora right after you finished?
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Great news! In less than 2 hours, I'm ripping your underwear off with my teeth!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we were in bed when his brother walks in, walks over to me, fist bumps me and says he just wanted to say hi, then leaves...so random lmao
IM GOING TO SIT ON YOUR FACE AND CHANT 'I BELIEVE THAT WE WILL WIN'
This bar smells like your ball sack. In a weird way I miss you.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
My sex life is driven by spite and alcohol
why is there glitter IN my vagina????
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