She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
She spilled some tequila on her hair somehow and I guess I felt bad for her, so I yelled "ROOMIES FOR LIFE" and dipped my hair in my tequila.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
He's freaking out just because my cat licked his balls while he was fucking me
i could have been the DD. this is ridiculous. i'm the most sober and getting the least ass.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
For once I am not in the mood. My vagina is good with life at the moment.
The apocalypse has arrived.
With 4 extra seconds dedicated to the dong.
These kind of text worry me.
The homeless woman that called me a "dirty looking cunt" the other day, was standing outside Starbucks today with a sign that said "Jesus loves you."
The part of "Dave" will now be played by "Rob." Rob, why don't you unzip and show Dave why that is.
Any man who can do squats while fucking you is a man worth keeping.
Randomize
