The money shot is kinda like the "The End" part of a children's book isn't it?
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
People are suprisingly accepting of someone doing a walk of shame in a toga...
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
Theres an amvulance here. It might be for me
before we left she put a post-it on the floor next to the toilet saying she was a pretty pretty princess
it was like vegas minus all of the penis and death threats
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I have come to the conclusion that my perfect boyfriend is a cardboard cutout of Link with a dildo attatched. Also, Merry Christmas.
Found out I slept with someone who likes Pitbull. I really should get to know someone better before I sleep with them.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
So unless we're getting married, I can't see him cry AND have sex with him. It just doesn't work like that.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.