Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
Seriously dude, you need to stop beating off to the ellen show, it's just weird.
dude this 15 year old girl saw our youtube vid and just facebook messaged me saying i was verry verry pretty. i have no schemas for how to respond to this situation.
woah 15?
i know! what is this dateline?
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
that cunt stole my fb status. SHE'S NOT THAT FUNNY
We'll both be dead in approximately 72-96 hours, with you bringing your liver out of retirement again, Favre.
Parents said they were cutting off my AmEx card. So I immediately went up to the liquor store and purchased $550 of booze before it was canceled. I'm expecting your arrival in 30 minutes.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
i dunno, a lot of my childhood feels like a drugged up fever dream
Truth be told it's significantly easier to get over someone when they file a police report on you
I think people are normalizing furries
at least he now gets to tell people how he once threw a party so epic that the next day they had to clean some girl's body paint off the ceiling
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?
Randomize
