my girls lil sis wanted to play hide & seek. she told her 2 go hide. we went to the room and had sex. she was hiding under the bed.
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Let's have a moment of silence for the guinea pig that drunk chick threw out our window.
Is it uncouth to have a themed intervention? I know how much you like Star Wars.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
I only listened to his story about leaving the Amish community because I was hoping for a free drink
my experiences serve only to benefit you young virgin
I need to immerse myself in a tub of peroxide to kill whatever traces of him are on me.
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
does anyone know where bryan is?
last i saw he was naked, and crying in the bathroom because there was no more booze.
He did a backflip because drugs
I feel like a dancer trapped in the body of a math instructor. Love, Mom
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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