we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I'm making tacos. Give me one good reason why we shouldn't be high while eating those tacos.
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
you two really need to work out your issues. my vagina can't handle another week of your pent up frustrations.
You fucked everything up-can't pass a cleared kitchen table without getting hard
Not sure if it's my shorts, hat, shoes, hair or soul but one of the above just got me drunk again from the glorious aroma of Keystone Light.
You puked on my feet last night. You owe me a pedicure.
I gave the guy a $20 tip on a $9 cab ride, he thought I was just bad at math but I was really just incredibly thankful to be alive and home.
I was like "don't worry, I'm a math major and you deserve the shit out of that 222% tip"
I really hope you didn't eat the bowl of melted vanilla ice cream I left on the coffee table. Because it is not melted vanilla ice cream.
You rope them in with the looks and the boobs, and I'll bore them into submission with random trivia. We can't lose.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
I made a half way decent playlist
Im gonna call it "hanging myself"
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I'm glad you threw up in my bed because now we talk.
I think my brain is throwing up inside my head. How do you live like this?
Randomize
