Every time I find out someone else from high school got pregnant accidentally, I want to declare victory over them.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
Is your delayed response due to the massive amount of judging going on?
I just saw him at the bookstore and all I could think about was him licking your ass
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got my poem back from the prof, there's a sticker of a girraffe on it and it says "you're awesome!" ... How can this even be considered real college?!?
if we break up, blackout me is coming back, making out with everything in sight
Theres a picture of me with cut up clothes rolling in the policeman's lawn, I missed you, summer.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
She described me as " a caterpillar of adorable quietness that exploded into a slutty butterfly" She definitely nailed it there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Handcuffs are allowed in carry on luggage :) just checked
We BOTH lost our virginities there. It's basically a landmark.
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
i love it when bitches who pick on you in high school get fat. thank you facebook you have made my day.
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
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