he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
He was sitting cross legged outside his tent repeatedly hitting the ground with a hammer and shouting 'this.is.a.good.idea.'
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
did you find a tooth?
did you lose one?
Just think. Tomorrow you'll wake up, shower, and get your brains fucked out. That's your ice cream. Today is your peas and carrots.
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Post-sex nachos deserve a song.
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
I'm more of a 'talk at me while I stare at you' kinda girl.
Im in my back seat in my own drive way with two beers left to shotgun and watching the sunrise. Am I over her yet?
YOU TRIED TO SWIM IN HER FISHTANK. I don't think she's going to call you.
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