I just got back to Nicks and I shoul dnot have drank this much when I have to work at 7AM!!!!!
Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Omg alex and i were cooking weiners on a campfire and a bear came and i am waayyy too high for this
Just scheduled a cocaine deal around my drug counsler appointment. Why yes, thank you, I do enjoy the irony that is my life.
so im goin to clemson & my drug dealers goin to penn state. this is the hardest breakup EVER.
My mail consisted of a box of dildos and christmas card from grandma.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
in case you blackout.. this is confirmation that yes, you were sitting spread eagle on the kitchen floor chugging pickle juice out of the jar.
I'm so covered in bruises. God dammit drunk me. We are a lady.
Signs of a stoner: trying everything in your fridge topped with peanut butter to seek satisfaction.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Im going to hell I gave him a handjob on the plane next, to an old guy playing video games on his iPad, on good friday.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
So I have now fucked both my roommates...This is why I can’t live with men.
I would have wore underwear last night if I knew I had to change a tire this morning
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