This pizza tastes like mashed potatoes. HOW HIGH DO YOU THINK I AM?
you can add "aspirated seaman" to the list of things your sister has been admitted to the hospital for
I just need you there to slap my dick when im flirting with her
It was a rude awakening when I turned on my phone and the first thing I saw was a picture of David's dick with a face on it, I need to stop drinking in his basement...
he called AT&T to make sure that he had insurance before he threw his cell phone into the fountain.
My therapist is concerned about your alcoholism.
They play video games, go on acid trips, and in times of need, are willing to donate plasma together. COUPLE OF THE YEAR.
I NEED to see if his girl has a sister.
Has anyone ever told you you're majestic like a sea turtle when you fuck?
And your cock privileges have been revoked.
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I'm with the cops, Trish's gay husband stabbed himself and is framing her for attempt of murder and I'm dressed 4 the club I'm wearing leather pants leather jacket leather boots and black club top. Embarrassed
I can tell just by looking at the wedding photos that the groom has hooked up with at least three of his groomsmen. I would feel bad for her except that she’s hooked up with two of the same ones.
Randomize
