I had just got her shirt off when I realized that I was about to fuck Chewbacca from Star Wars. The way she moaned confirmed that I was.
we're doing shots for every degree below freezing it is outside
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
You "were" hungover, which is past tense. So that gives you no excuse not to go out tonight.
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I refuse to apologize. Any dick that comes that close to my face uninvited is gonna get bit
After I was arrested and in the back of the squad, she lit a cig. I politely stuck my head through the glass opening and asked for a drag. She instantly slammed my head back, blew smoke at me and shut the glass. My view on state trooper chicks is forever tainted.
How many drinks/blunt hits do you think I could get if I wore an "it's my birthday" shirt
I think you just miss his friendship.
I think it's his ability to give me multiple orgasms.
So none of you told me my tits were popping out of my shirt for three hours?
We told you. Repeatedly. You said you made it look good.
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I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
You told me you could hear my heartbeat through my penis but your methods were unethical.
Sixty five beats a minute. I stand by that.
How do you say "put it in me" in Spanish... I'm dealing with language barriers here.
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