Update: Discussing lingerie with my father. He likes sheer black things. Not into the colorful stuff I wear.
How am I suppose to look him in the face when I know a commercial lasts longer than he does?
we got blazed and looked up peoples criminal records
I just learned in bio that our sole purpose for life is to have sex.. so your high number is acceptable. its actually lacking.
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The dean held back my hair as I was puking after graduation. That means so much more than a diploma and a handshake.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
Condom broke. Took her to CVS for plan B and parked in expectant mothers spot. I laughed.. she cried
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
Ive never seen one person more proud of themselves of peeing in public and getting away with it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do drug dealers work on Memorial Day?
He has silky zebra print sheets, which you would think he put on just for me, but the bed was unmade. Did I just sleep with a closet case??
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
what happened to you last night?
I dunno man, i pissed in a urinal, sent you a picture of my vagina and woke up with 25 bar stamps on my arms.. you tell me
i forgot how loud opening a beer is in a house where your not allowed to drink
I brought my porn computer to class by accident
How much porn do you watch if you need a special computer?
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