So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
This election needs to be over, im tired of girls asking who im going to vote for mid hookup
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
How on earth did you break your wrist?
I went into someone's yard so I could pee and I found a tireswing
Why is the clock ticking so loud? Now I know how Captain Hook feels.
I think I'm leaving the streamers and balloons up from 4th of july till after he stops by. It'll be like the universe is celebrating his massive dick.
If there was a category for "most likely to end up a serial killer" in your high school yearbook then I'm sure you would have won it
WHY DID YOU NOT OFFER TO LET HIM STAY
Dude, it's like you want him inside me more than i do
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
My autobiography will be 500 pages of the words "I probably should've thought this through" typed over and over.
why is there a dog in my house with your initials shaved in it's fur?
dude, i just woke up in a house i've never seen. i have bigger problems
I'm eating cold pizza from work and drinking beer from a wine glass trying to decide if I want to shower or just rub one out and go to sleep. How have I ever gotten laid?
Because you're really hot before taking the time to actually get to know you.
Randomize
