my mother and i just seriously had a convorsation about why you cant Google "Refurbished Dildos"
Awww, you two will make beautiful abortions together...
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Well, it's hard to say. Last night he puked a perfect circle around him on the floor, and then sat in it insisting it would protect him from the smoke monster. He's was still there last time I checked.
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
How much did you drink?
Enough to be hungover and still think roller coasters were a good idea
First of all you're supposed to say "you're not fat". And second of all never ever deprive me of nachos.
If I had your job the next day id be on the news. And not the good news. Like fox & friends. Nancy grace would have my ass.
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
The one that slept in my truck and you peed in his face?
I feel like I shouldn't be left around 30 year olds when I'm drunk
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Do I have to cook for the potluck? Can I just bring a costco size bottle of Vodka?
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
Randomize
