I see my mary-anne walkin' awa-y-y! Bow Nahw now new, ne ne ne ne ne, ne ne nehw, ne ne new new Nah dan ah bwawn-now, ba bwan'll buh dada bwiddly doo.
That was supposed to be me air guitaring the solo from More than A Feeling
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'm walking down the street with a Starbucks in one hand and a flask in the other. People seem to have a staring problem
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
I'm at a bar where I literally walked in to the bathroom and some chick told me to never go to San Joaquin state pen
Its a sick, sad, world when parents get more ass then you.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
Omg have I shown you my skeezy ex fiancée?
The other one.
On a unprofessional note, there's a new girl in photo.
That wasn't unprofessional. The fact that I'm going to fuck her is unprofessional.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
I'm dying of laughter, but I'm also just dying
Send help
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
He sent me off with a naked dance ending in a meat swing. I don't think I'll be seeing him again.
i'll...probably just offer you drugs?
i'll...probably take them in all honesty
I will bring Jesus to court if he punishes me for that
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