can a staight man not wear seersucker in this town?
She was Ugg boots AND a Bumpit. Of course I didn't sleep with her.
Um don't talk to me about fat. I just used my chip bag to cover up all my candy wrappers in the garbage.
i'm high and 74% sure there's a monster in my closet
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
I think it may of been me pulling down my pants is why she walked away.
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
It might have taken me 30 minutes but I finally finished the toast I made. That hungover.
I don't think she can come out, she went too hard in the Intro to Theater Drinking Game at 2:30
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
You don't know weird until you've had a musical wet dream about your older brother.
Where are you and why are you fighting with a bird?
He fingerfucked me in the hot tub and then we had sex in the wine cellar. See thats why I like partying with rich people
While she was pissing on the neighbors shrubs, they threatened to call the cops...she mumbled 'don't threaten me with a good time", so to answer your question, yes she was drunk.
well, shes hot as hell, but she does keep saying she's the president of the loch ness monster's fan club, so that's kinda a red flag...
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