He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
Whoa! I think of you when I eat cottage cheese.
he said i look beautiful when i cum. i think i'm in love.
So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
does she really think making her boyfriend delete me on facebook is going to magically stop us from hooking up?
screw jello shots the kids from the culinary school made pudding shots with 4 loko.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
That point of drunk where you're in a bar bathroom and you're like "F*ck you bra! I'm not taking your sh*t anymore! and you take it off and throw it in a trashcan.
You motherfucker. I just had an MRI with a penny under my boob.
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
I woke up and sent him a text that said 'I'm sorry forever'
He's got the most well kempt beard I've ever seen and I need it between my thighs is basically what I'm saying
Randomize