So my earrings and necklace kept jingling and hitting him in the face, and he told me felt like he was fucking a Christmas tree
i would only ever fuck harry potter if he was on a broomstick.
Night out in new white coat = success. Offered free breast exams all night, two took me up on it, woke up with one. I love medical school!!!
Just dont tell him. Tell him you colored your vagina for breast cancer awareness month. He will understand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She said she'd heard about my nickname in high school. Apparently sledgehammer isn't as popular as you'd believe...
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
I'm in the sex attic, crying, eating french toast and taco
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He started saying the pledge of allegiance so his boner would go down. Merica.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
I think I swiped left on my soulmate
I always knew I would be boring and die in an Uber.
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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