is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
you shall refer to me as my indian name from now on...running with dumb cunts
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
And tell the hostess not to worry, she's narcoleptic and fell asleep on the way to the bar, but she'll be fine in a few minutes.
The uberlube is also flammable
I almost died today via plastic wrap. I AM THE REASON THEY PUT WARNING LABELS ON THINGS.
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
It's Jesse McGoddamn Cartney, the whole world sings that shit
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
hooked up with him and then had a conversation with his ex about how we hate people who hook up with our exs...
Isn't it funny how we're still best friends after that incident with the old lady in the bathroom
You fucking bailed on me. But I love you still
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