is it appropriate to call someone “ a tasty piece of bitch?” This is time sensitive.
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
I found her sitting in the shower having an argument with the dolphins on the shower curtain.
All I'm saying is that she needs to invest in some razors. But her head game is great. The pros and cons in last minute hook-ups
Please tell me what happened last night... specifically who told me it was a good idea to pee in my shoe.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
The cabbie told me fat girls shouldn't wear tight clothes, and that he feels bad for the guys that have to be underneath them, especially because their positions are "very limited" and proceeded to ask me if I had a trash can and if I could throw something away for him. Don't worry though, he promised it wasn't anything "bad". He then handed me a tied up grocery bag with a bunch of wadded up Kleenex that weighed about 3 pounds. To answer your question, yes I made it home. Fml
Life just isn't the same without him waking me up at 4 in the afternoon with a look of pity on his face...
I don't care if he was in that porno. He looked like he knew what he was doing.
I GOT THE PAPER IN AT 11:58
EAT MY ENTIRE ASS COM 101
i now understand why vodka
My Sexting was not on an AP level
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
I don't wanna SLEEP with him, I want to start bar fights with him. There's a difference.
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