that's an acceptable place to lick
just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
we just stared at taco bell's menu on the website for 2 hours
10 dollar pizza all the toppings you want. Wait Until You See This Pizza
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
people who like being in relationships make me feel bad about myself.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
i had to sit with a fan pointed directly to my vag for a good 10 minutes
She was mad I came so fast. I was like, It's the Olympics! Fastest time wins! We can train you in the offseason.
Please tell me there is not a bookmark on your browser with the title "Christmas Porn"
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
Omg the world wants us to be better people
I refuse
Why so philosophical about cake and sex this morning?
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
I feel like I haven't slapped your ass in years. This will be awesome.
Randomize