Yesterday I was informed there is a jewish dating website called jdate, I'm considering joining out of academic curiosity
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
When he came he sounded like a flock of birds hitting puberty
He said my breasts were God's way of making up to him for all the shit he's had to endure in his life.
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
after last halloween when i met that 26yr old guy from russia who was hot until we madeout and he became obsessed with touching my forehead after the ecstasy he did and then tried to sell me pills from an m&m mini container, i think im staying away from parties downtown
Bring scissors.....i think im gonna have to be cut out of this damn jockstrap
The bet was for naked jumping jacks. And it back fired, she just laughed at all the slapping noise.
I just find it funny that nobody ever threatens to call the cops on us until we have a Harry Potter party
When I picked you up, you were drinking Maker's Mark out of the bottle with a crazy straw.
Its so bad though\nOur relationship has gotten to the point where im posing nude with a swiffer
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
Its 7am I'm awake still drunk, there is food, random clothing and road cone in my room. I can't decide if this is a failure or a success???
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
Randomize
