Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
i just walked passed a table of guys by myself.. they looked @ me talked and then yelled 7
id pin you as more of an 8
Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
so I ended up banging her last night
dude I remember her. You sure it was a her?
i don't even remember
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
No I am not eating basil off your cock
He pulled the washer 5 feet out from the wall screaming about quarters
drunk. just smoked a spliff with a 19yr old hungarian bike taxi driver and bonded over the difficulties of getting weed in a different country. idk y shit like this isnt in the study abroad info packets
We share an apartment, weed and genitals. It's called being practical not in love.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
How do u ask ur friend if shes keeping her kid but in a chill way
You win. I am a lesbian who maybe slightly jaded. I didn't mean to throw the knife at you head.
i did these weird ass ab exercises once that left me queefing for weeks
Randomize
