Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
Turns out, his fucking is as lame and staggered as his NFL career.
Yeah. I was about to call 911 but I ended up breaking the door frame off then ran and puked all the way home.
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
11/10 would buy him a McLobster
This is a weird combination of planning and sexting but whatever
Wtf can everyone stop fucking in my grandma's bed? This is like the third time
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
i am risking my non lesbian vagina for your needs. i better be the best friend you ever had
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