you miss my big massive throbbing cock dont you?
Woah.
that's not how you spell hell yes.
Jake was my 1st thought but I seriously thought u already did him... & then there's the getting the clap story... so I settled on Ben for my guess.
I have done Jake, not Ben. But this was fresh meat. And P.S. it was ghonnerea.
Ahh, yes. It's apparently too early in the morning to keep your partners and their std's straight.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
I need a second opinion on who's blood is in my car.
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
I feel like I knew it was fucked up, but feared that god would take my dick away if I didn't use it last night.
Need to spend sober time with him while fully clothed. I can't decide if he's a seriously amazing man or a complete fucking dickbag.
This is me not judging you for what a fine line you draw between the two.
Apparently I had 2 bloody noses and after my sis put me to bed at the hotel, I escaped and my sister's friend found me in an elevator with some guy
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
At least you didn't lose your virginity to chumbawumba
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
On a brighter more disgusting note...... I think I just shart myself but I'm too afraid to find out.
you started putting peanut butter on your pubes.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
Randomize
