actually, I'm a sock model
ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
about to play the homeward bound drinking game. alone. what are you doing tonight?
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
you put your hands over the taxi driver's eyes and shouted GUESS THE WAY TO THE CLUB
I think a girl on my floor is watching zombie porn. There is literally no other description for the noise coming from her room.
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
I ate mushroom chocolates & went to the botanical gardens for Christmas. HAPPY FUCKING HOLIDAYS
Someone needs to fuck me in my slutty pumpkin costume and I would ideally like it to be you
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
im on a boat
How did you get this number?
I’ve looked at so many mouse vaginas in the past week
Randomize
