she was hot for a redneck and i dont look at teeth
k, so I just picked a four leaf clover, then saw my dads penis. Lucky? I think not.
Just burped. Tasted like beer and cherios...Beerios. This is gonna be quite a day.
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
he broke up with me while standing outside, half naked, waiting to fuck him. i feel like a leper right about now.
Hey do you have anything at your house 30 ft. tall to throw eggs off of?
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
Also, sex on a first date is no, right? Really, I just don't want to clean my apartment, but I'm trying to hide behind "morals" in an effort to appear less lazy.
Sometimes I actually rage on Tuesday, come back, and do homework drunk and pull an all nighter.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
According to facebook, I opened up a can of whupass on some douche who poured all the vodka on the ground.
You called the wrong number but I salute you.
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
