Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
sudden memory flashback: you and i having sex on the bed, erin sitting naked in your desk chair drinking whiskey straight from the bottle while harassing you for your computer password to play some "mood music." high five. go us.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Your mother liked my album on facebook that's only filled with drunk pictures. I don't know what to feel about this
Get this. He's a red head and he works at country oven bakery. He will forever be known as the gingerbread man.
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
I did all i could do but i woke up smelling like cigars and theres salsa all over my face
What do you mean? Just eat his food and have sex with him. Unless you want a relationship, then just eat his food.
Hahahahahha. You saved a homeless man. You're actually the mother Teresa of skanks.
My roommate randomally bought me two bags of pretzels. Worst "Sorry you can hear me fucking my boyfriend everynight" gift ever.
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
Randomize
