So the coke mirror was perfectly angeled at my face right when i woke up this morning. I now know how I'd look on intervention.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Ok the fact that you know THAT phrase perfectly is terrifying. You just proved you can slut it up in mulitiple languages.
Ok if you are accepting my apology, please continue to ignore me. If you are not, please fill out the brief survey that follows, to help me improve my people relations: a) your a bitch please leave me alone b)your crazy pls leave me alone c) I never cared ab u please leave me alone. D) all of the above e) all of the above but I wouldn't mind still fucking u. F) who are you again? Your answer will not b shared and will b used in accord. With the law. TY
I'm having Vietnam flashbacks. This Kid I hooked up with is speaking in class and I keep experiencing the terror.
you missed an awesome concert last night. some middle aged woman that was grinding on me kept trying to stick her hand down my pants. i ended up rewarding her tenacity by letting her hold onto it for a song, i think it made her night.
he just gave me a love letter in polish. he thinks i speak polish. I DONT SPEAK POLISH
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
NEW HOUSE RULE! If you make it in a chicks cleavage it's 3 cups and bra off.
BP at your house from now on.
My whole house smells like Spaghetti-Os and cat litter. I think I've failed as an adult.
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
He named his newborn baby after a character in the Hobbit and that is literally keeping me up at night.
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
That is our entire relationship. We match bowls and give each other head. What more could you possibly want?
Randomize
