I got drunk at the beach today. I got the word Badass! tatooed all the way across my foot. Probably a bad idea.
Most awkward sex ever...
And im texting you in the middle.
Call me "white mamba"
Your dick is not a dangerous deadly poisonous snake
It is white.
She introduced herself and then asked "have you ever fucked a girl with a cast?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
Turns out lunch break sex with someone you cant stand being around for any amount of time just makes you wish you had gone to get tacos like you originally planed.
Would 7 layered rainbow jello shots entice you?
I want my birthday to be like the hunger games where all the contenders for my vaj have to fight each other off to win the prize
Can I have the second place winner?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
i woke up at 4 pm face down on my hardwood living room floor. i would say its a new low but i think I found my new napping spot
Your favorite boobs are sending you seasons greetings
i almost threw up on his dick. its like icarus, flew too close to the sun. except the sun is his dick and my throat was icarus
So, were you planning on telling me you left your panties in my glovebox??
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
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