She's perfect. Funny, gorgeous, 3 tats, been through a lot, bright. I'm in love.
No. I still stand by my previous statement that nachos and tequila is the breakfast of champions.
some guy just pulled a dress out of a fax machine...I have no idea what the hell is going on
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know if its because i'm stoned or what but painting my kitchen yellow makes it look crooked
I was still in a towel. We hadn't even started drinking yet and the champagne bottle dropped and exploded literally up into my vagina.
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
What's more awkward than your little brother in law screaming, "I SAW YOUR TITTIES" at the breakfast table?
His step dad chiming in on the jokes.
Real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch buck Rodgers in Tuesday.
Jesus Christ you're perfect.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was kissing me at red light while his penis was in an aluminum beer bottle peeing..
the last thing I remember is taking a pull of ever clear and chasing it with vodka
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I feel like everything in my life has been preparing me for my future sex robot experience
You’re so close!!!
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