Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
gettin drunk isnt as much fun when i can use my own id for it
And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
She has puke in her hair, is missing a shoe and is now crying. People trust her to be their child's teacher
I miss the smell of you or some shit.
He made me meet him in the baby department of walmart where he was waiting with his pregnant girlfriend. Time for a new dealer
I'm sorry you were dumb enough to get played by a male cheerleader
I like how he had to correct himself in stating that I was the fat one in the threesome.
The only reason I can fathom that you've been able to continue to date new people this long is that women continue to become of age each year, and the younger ones don't know any better.
In the middle of our bar crawl last night we stopped to pet dogs at a dog park. who would let a drunk person bet play with their dog???
i don't know why he's complaining, i'm the one with four hickeys on my ass.
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I was thrusting to the beat of Felix Navidad..
Best night if my life? Time I got eaten out in the backseat of a M5 while eating White Castle. Then he fucked me. Perfect
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
Randomize
