i thought she was just hairy. i didn't know she was also a man.
i am not above fucking your little sister on your bed
We're gonna have to suck it up and start making out for free drinks. No homo. I'm watching Tyra "I kissed a girl and I got free drinks."
Let's do it. All homo
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
You blackout rapped the entire DMX song Party Up last night at karaoke without looking at the screen. Then you Tebowed on stage, hugged a black guy, puked in a garbage can, then left. You deserve a medal.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
It's something I can't competently describe without making sex sounds.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
It's a herpes check up not a beauty pageant
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
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