Eating meat and looking at porn while roommate is at church for Ash Wednesday. Win.
so I woke up without pants, but my cardigan was still on and fully buttoned. curious.
Just saw a field sobriety test being administered at 730 am, I now know I do not have a drinking problem
dont call me baby and dont touch my ears. ITS ALL I ASK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Come on Nikki god gave you a vagina for a reason, so you could tell guys what kind of shots to buy you
you are not my drinking buddy, you are my drinking enemy.
You're such an expert partier. I feel like 22-year-old recent graduates should have to intern with you.
I'm a pro at the other 9-5
If I walk in on you beating off, at least have the fucking decency to STOP BEATING OFF!
I wasn't going to just ask my parents for a damn vibrator for christmas
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I butt dialed her mom while cheating on her. Needless to say Christmas will be awkward.
There’s nothing that says motivation more than watching these little geniuses on Kids Baking Championship New Year’s Day. I’m ready to fuck shit up this year.
I just wish he would stop trying to bring his emotional baggage into our sexual relationship.
I don't care. It's wine Wednesday get your gameface on.
I could be doing way worse things besides texting him 'come over and bang my headache away'. i could be on meth
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
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