idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
is there a legit reason for the weird voicemail I got at 2:14am?all I could make out was 'help me' 'two hours' and 'toilet butt'. wtf did u drink.
sometimes i wish i was a boob, they get to chill in soft and cuddly little cup things.
Everyone makes mistakes, yours just means you will forever be known as the chick that tried to steal a cheese plate from the funeral.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay, lets just agree to keep all cutlery related activities to a minimum.
ok perfect im about to bedazzle our mini keg named hans. he is ready to rage
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My Internet history has 23 searches for 24 hour cake. Self respect plummeting.
Aaaand the winner of the worst decision of Sunday night goes to me as I pull up to his house in my lingerie.
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
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