The class that normally occupies the room we use for my Monday class had to do posters as if for a Hamlet movie and they pick actors for each character and this person wrote "Robert D. Niro"
A freshman just referred to Home Improvement as 'tim the tool man show'. People born after 1990 are not people.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
had to split buying plan b over two cards. I will no longer challenge people to get on my level
he convinced me that i wont have to do the walk of shame bc he has to go to jail in the morning
It's only 8pm and Karl already got a stripper fired.
I would not be 19 again if you paid me. Guess who found naked pictures of themselves? Fuck cocaine
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would love a rich wife. Then I would be like a gym teacher or some shit. Bigfoot hunter maybe.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Yeah except my drinking partners aka my parents went to sleep Cuz ya know, they're old.
Pretty sure one of my drivers stopped to get laid while he was delivering a pizza. Is it appropriate to give him a write-up AND a high-five?
I'm not going to waste the next hour of my life writing a diplomatic email explaining that she's bitch. I have Parks and Rec to watch.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
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