I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
im sober playing flip cup. its like cheating.
he's werid. hell kiss me after i go down on him but he wont kiss me after i eat anything with mustard.
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
This was baby jesus's way of getting you to wait until the next bikini wax
I smell like gasoline and adventure.
If it involves mee putting on a bra and discontinuing my 11 am drinking my answer is a polite fuck YOU
The only thing he had going for him was mad fingering skills. the ONLY thing. crayons have a wider circumference.
I would like to request a high five for getting laid while wearing crocs and a crab hat.
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
Are we going to go home and do it or do I have time to eat my nachos bell grande first?
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
if you and your penis don't hurry up, I'm getting drunk without you.
Think he has a gf
Yea that shit doesn’t necessarily stop me
Randomize
