Woke up with a treasure map of my room stuck with sticky tape to my ceiling. followed it and found $75 with a note saying; "eat this if we're invaded"... I'm never getting stoned again
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
Do you know of any good hiding spots in the Atlanta area?
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
That would be an interesting position... Not entirely certain how that'd work!
Gravity is no match for my libido
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
And I'm stuck at home while my dad's in vegas hanging out with Zach gali... Zach... That guy from the hangover
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
My brother and I have had one conversation in the past like 3 weeks and it was about what it would be like as a sentient butt plug
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Is is gay if I donloaded Grinder to see if my roommate is gay?
Also, do you have any insight as to WHY I have a note saved from the 17th of June that reads *clears throat*, "you got that swanky blues libido"
I'm officially disproving the fact that a hoe never gets cold bc this hoe is COLD.
The bad thing is that I bled through my bandages last night and keep finding blood around the house. It's almost like a scavenger hunt for solber me. I get to find out where drunk me went.
Randomize
