Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
I may or may not be laying in bed naked watching The Nanny. Niles is so spunky.
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
Her parents came home early, i had to hug her mom with a condom on...
Is being a pregnant whore worse than an average one?
You have no idea how much I'm praying for my moms side of the family's infertility right now
I can't believe you broke a Paula dean wooden spoon over my ass
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
Look. I've got things to do today.. Will you hurry up and come over so I can give you some head and get my day started already
Outside
Within the hour, he sent me 8 texts and 4 voice memos. One of the memos was just him whistling for 3 minutes. ...It's official, I attract the crazies.
I yelled "NO FLEX ZONE!!!" at the guy that thinks it's cool to take off his shirt at the party then proceeded to puking
We just started our own DARE program: Drugs are really enjoyable.
Randomize
