I asked her if she watches the office. She said no, but do you watch I'm a celebrity get me outa here? That's when i knew. Deal breaker
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
He pulled his pants down and said blow me, while passing out on my bed. I then pulled his pants up as he continuously started moaning in the background.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
hes supposed to be my fuck buddy. im not supposed to see him on his knees praying by my bed when i walk into my room.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
I just want my paycheck, and my friends. And alcohol and tacos. Is that so much to ask?
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
I mean she did throw a tantrum because you wouldn't let her suck your dick
It's the Ides of March, motherfucker. That means we're supposed to daydrink, right?
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
I would really like it if you guys got out of my bush
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